Sparky the Fish

Recently we experienced what I thought was going to be tough life lesson for my kids. We had our first pet death. Sparky the Fish was a beta fish that was given to my daughter by her swim coach this past June. In that short time Sparky went through 3 or 4 new bowl changes (how does a small fish keep cracking the dang bowl?), survived numerous bowl cleanings and was getting used to me fishing him out with the net. We even had friends stress over him while we were out of town because nobody wanted Sparky to die on their watch.

Well, Sparky died on my watch.  I had taken the kids to school and was alone in the house when the feeling came over me that something just wasn't right. I grabbed his food and threw the 7 or 8 pellets that I usually tossed in each morning and waited for him to rise to the top to capture his reward. Nothing. I tapped on the bowl thinking he was sleeping. This was not my first time thinking he had bit the big one just to be surprised when I jolted him awake and away he would swim. I anxiously tapped the bowl thinking he was playing his little game with me, but this time was different. Nothing. I moved the bowl to get a better look and let me tell you people, it wasn't pretty.

Our beautiful little flame colored beta was now the color of a burnt out piece of charcoal. His little gills were gaping open like he had died in the midst of taking the largest gulp of air possible. Although he was still on the bottom of the bowl he had assumed the belly up position and I knew it was only a matter of time and we would have a floater.

While I was glad that the kids had not discovered Sparky in this less than flattering position the daunting task of explaining what had happened was placed squarely on my shoulders. They would be home from school shortly and I had to weigh my options and fast. Obviously I had to dispose of our friend, but did I wait until the kids were home and make a big deal about it or just manage the task on my own. I hate to admit, but I took the cowards way out and sent Sparky down the road on the septic highway before anyone could argue otherwise. The last thing I wanted to do was to dig a little grave in our garden and lay to rest our beloved fish. I have seen Pet Cemetery and there was no way I would of been able to walk outside knowing his little fish carcase was decomposing under the rose bush waiting for the day he could rise again.

So with Sparky's funeral taken care of I just had to break the news to the little people. While Sparky was our pet, I wasn't sure how traumatic the news of his passing was going to be. The kids loved Sparky in their own way even though they only asked to feed him about once a week and all other maintenance duties were left to me. As I mulled over my options, I cleaned up his bowl, put everything away and seriously considered not saying a darn thing until someone else brought it up. I know, I know...yes, at times I am a real coward! Then the guilt and nagging feeling that if I were a good mother I would take this opportunity to ease my children into the concept of mortality. Where is the raising kids manual when you really need it?

So when the kids returned from their day of education, I began my hard knock life lesson with them. "Kids, I have some sad news. Sparky passed away today." Blink, blink, blank stare. "What I mean to say is that Sparky died". A little glimmer of understanding passed over their faces. I quickly dove into what a good little fish he was and that we actually had him for much longer than we ever thought we would and that all the other fish from the banquet give-a-way had already died months ago. It was just Sparky's time and I was so sorry for them. As I prepared myself for the tears and soul searching questions I was met with complete understanding and dare I say, a tad bit of indifference. OK, so maybe it was only me that was a little attached to Sparky the Fish.

But then they asked a question I knew would come, "Mom, what did you do with Sparky?" Well Kids, I gave Sparky a fitting burial at sea. "Mom, what does that mean?" "Well, I flushed him down the toilet." "Oh Mom, that is so gross. I will never be able to use that toilet again. EWWWWW." "Oh come on, you guys have seen Nemo...all drains lead to the ocean, I just sent Sparky home." Somehow, that made it all better. Sparky was home and they were OK with it. What I thought was going to be a tough discussion with mind altering questions about mortality and what happens in the ever after ended up being just a blip on the radar of my kid's day.

On the other hand, I couldn't get to sleep for 3 days.

Rest in peace, Sparky.